Remedies for The Sweats (aka anxiety)

There's a man talking to the girl who sits in the cubicle next to mine and his voice is identical to the voice that I used to have to listen to in Spanish, when we would do our audio tests in the computer lab. Identical. I have to say, I find it extremely comforting, though I'm not sure why. I hated the sound of that voice in college because hearing it meant that I was in the language lab, pretending to understand Spanish. But today, on this ridiculous Tuesday, for some ridiculous reason I can't explain, I can't imagine a voice I'd rather hear.

I've been searching for comforts lately--things that calm me. Why I am anxious, I do not know. In search of calm, I've just re-read the Harry Potter series. Well, not all of it, just books 4-7. I don't know why I didn't start at the beginning. I can't explain either, why reading Harry Potter calms me. Maybe it is just a break from reality. Maybe I just like to imagine that Fred and George Weasley are my bffs and we fly around on brooms all day playing pranks on people. Maybe I like to imagine that Sirius Black exists and is my soul mate. Maybe. Maybe on occasion I see a stick on the ground that strongly resembles what I imagine a wand should look like and I briefly consider picking it up and realizing that this wand contains the tail feather of a phoenix and that I am destined to save the wizarding world from evil. Maybe I sometimes consider that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named does exist, and I encounter him on a daily basis at work. Maybe.

Another anxiety remedy I've recently attempted is re-watching Gilmore Girls. This one is even more difficult to explain as I never really watched the show in the first place until the last two seasons. And that was because my HLM loved it. But now, I just have a strong desire to return to Stars Hollow. Because it's nice to imagine you live in a small town where everyone knows you and isn't boring at all and you have an intense coffee addiction and the rugged man who owns the diner in town is the love of your life. Also it's nice to imagine that you come from money and have always lived in Connecticut and have things like an ivy league school and trust fund babies waiting for you on the other side of adolescence. That's nice to imagine.

I'm searching for things that comfort me. And I don't know why I need comforting in the first place. August is over, and I haven't necessarily been weepy in September just...in need of some comfort. I can't explain why at this juncture in my life my sources of comfort are Gilmore Girls and Harry Potter and the Spanish-Speaking man currently in the cubicle next to mine. I can't explain it. And I won't attempt to here, I will just continue to share the strange workings of my brain with anyone who can stomach it.